I was due with Noah the 1st of April. It was recommended to me by my midwife, Candace, that I not tell people a specific due date. I was having a homebirth and inducing was not an option for me. But Candace already knew that the women in my family don't have babies on a due date schedule. Candace is also my sister, which definitely added a beneficial dynamic to our relationship as sisters as well as between midwife and expectant mom. On average my mom and both sisters had all their babies 2 weeks after the due date. But I fell prey to the excitement of my due date approaching. I also had a friend with the same due date. For a week we were overdue together; taking walks together, having lunch, sharing our excitement and anxiety as being first time moms. It was so nice to be going through all of that with a friend. She delivered her baby on the 10th.
Time started slowing down around me. One day felt like two weeks. I knew my baby had to come out, but I started feeling like it was never going to happen. I was also starting to get sick of the phone ringing with relatives or friends asking if we'd had the baby yet. Even my father-in-law thought we'd had the baby and just not called! I started screening every single call, afraid I would end up yelling at someone who was just trying to be caring and nice. I wanted to have this baby more than anybody else wanted me to! Everyone was so eager for me to deliver that it became somewhat of a pressure, and emotionally it was harder than I thought it could be. That last week I only wanted to be around my husband, Donald, and I probably talked to Candace everyday on the phone. I know I talked and cried her ear off. She understood though, she'd been there too and that was comforting to know. Needless to say, I will NOT be announcing a due date during any future pregnancies!
On the 15th we decided to let Candace strip my membranes. Blood came out on her fingers which was a good sign that it had worked. We waited all weekend and nothing happened. Monday the 18th during a tear-filled phone conversation, Candace suggested that I write a letter to my baby. I took her advice and started a letter to Noah. I wanted to write with my heart which sent me into a very relaxed and focused place, thinking only of my baby. Amazingly, halfway through writing the letter I started having contractions, around 4:45pm. I didn't let myself get excited but kept focusing on the letter. After an hour of timable contractions that were 8 to 10 minutes apart, I had a pretty good idea that I was beginning this long-awaited labor process. I welcomed these contractions. They did not hurt and I secretly hoped that they would continue to be this tolerable. That evening they continued to be regular and painless. Donald and I took a walk around the neighborhood and shared what we hoped would be our last dinner without a baby.
It was hard to sleep that night because I was excited, but I knew sleep was extremely important and necessary this early in the game. I awoke around 5am with slightly stronger contractions. They were keeping me awake so I went into Noah's nursery with a watch to time the contractions and a handheld yatzee game. I rocked in the glider, played yatzee, and listened to a lullaby CD as the contractions came and went. They were about 5 to 6 minutes apart now. I called Candace for an update and we concluded that she didn't need to come yet, I was still in the early labor stage.
I went back to bed around 6am to get more rest. Donald and I agreed that he would go to work until I was farther along so for the rest of the morning I labored alone. The contractions gradually became more intense throughout the morning. I took a shower and washed my hair, I had a feeling that once the baby was here I wouldn't have time for things like that! I then laid in bed for the rest of the morning breathing through and envisioning the contractions as waves to ride. This technique really helped me at this point of labor. By late morning I was feeling more of the sensation of pain during the contractions. Laying on my side made them tolerable but breathing became more important to work through them.
Candace and Amy, Candace's assistant, arrived around noon. We were scheduled for a prenatal anyway so they came to check on me. As they walked into the bedroom and I started updating them, they smiled at each other and stated that I wasn't close yet. We talked for a short while and they decided to proceed with their work schedule until I needed them.
I decided to eat something because I hadn't had anything all morning. I knew food would give me more energy for later. Around 1:30, as I took my last bite of chicken salad, I heard a "pop" sound. I actually looked around to see what had made the noise. When I started to feel the moisture I knew my water had broken. I instantaneously went into active labor and immediately the contractions became more intense. I called Donald and Candace and hoped that they would arrive very soon, I knew I didn't want to be alone anymore. I felt the need to pace. I circled my kitchen countless times. My body was overriding my mind and I couldn't have stopped circling the kitchen if I tried! I reminded myself of an animal in labor. I was to do what my body needed in order to get Noah moving downward and apparently pacing was working. I walked round and round the kitchen until Donald got home which was about 45 minutes later.
My memories become more fuzzy around this time, as I know my mind was elsewhere. Candace arrived at some point and around 3:30 I wanted her to check me. I was only 5 cm dilated. It was a little disappointing but I didn't have time to dwell on it. I remained on our bed for a few more contractions but lying down did not feel good. Donald tried to comfort me by applying pressure to my back or massaging me, but most of the time it didn't help and I ended up pushing his hands off me. A hand to squeeze and low panting breaths worked best for me through most of my contractions.
Not long after being checked I felt sick. I vomited and felt so much better. I immediately became more talkative and probably even smiled. It was around 5:30 and I expressed a desire to labor some in the shower. We placed a birth/yoga ball in the tub. I sat on the ball while the water came down on my back. It felt so refreshing and good. The contractions were tolerable again. When the water became cold I got out and went back to the bedroom. I think I could've labored much longer in the shower had we not run out of hot water. I knew I didn't want to lay down so they brought in a chair for me to sit on while I leaned over and onto the bed. I stayed there for most of the remaining active labor stage.
I vomited again not realizing at that time that I was getting through the transition stage. Again I felt better, but not quite as good as the first time. Around 8:30pm, Donald and I went into the kitchen where Candace and Amy were eating. I wanted to know when I could get in the tub. We had set up an inflatable kiddy pool in our living room to have a waterbirth. I leaned against the counter for two really intense "good" contractions and found myself crossing my legs. I was feeling the urge to push!
Everything started to happen pretty fast around me. The water was put on the stove to boil and Candace was getting her materials out. It was time to get in the water and I was as excited as a woman in labor could be. The water was instant relief and I wished I had gotten in sooner. I only had a couple more contractions before I really started pushing. I realized quickly that being on my back was not productive nor did it feel good to me. I turned over onto my knees and leaned over the side of the pool. Donald sat outside of the pool ready to hold my hand. Pushing was probably the hardest part of labor for me. I wish I could say that I felt no pain, but the fact of my labor is that it was quite painful, most of all pushing. I let out high-pitched groans and moans that I didn't know were within me. Donald was scared that the neighbors would call the cops for domestic abuse.
My mom arrived sometime during the pushing. When she came into the living room I looked at her and told her I was going to cuss. She held one hand, Donald held the other. The best part for me was when the ring of fire came. I welcomed it. I knew I could deal with the 60-90 seconds of burning because then I knew the hardest part would be over, and it was. When Noah crowned and I pushed his head out, I could feel his body turn inside of me. That was awesome! I turned around after his head was out so I could push the rest of him out sitting up. Donald and I had planned that he would catch Noah and I guess in the moment of birthing Noah I forgot this, because as I made that last push I reached down in the water and grabbed my baby!
I was so relieved that it was over and now I had this beautiful baby in my arms. He had the softest cry and he looked perfect to me. After close to an hour of pushing, Noah was born at 10:11pm [April 19th] and weighed 7lbs. 6oz.